This past week I posted three poems on my Instagram account and wanted to share them here. I am very proud of them and hope you find something in them that moves you. If not, then I did my best and I wish you well. If you do, then stay a while and maybe we can inspire each other.
As a writer I typically always carry a pen on me regardless of whether or not I’ll actually use it, I just believe I’ll always need it, I usually have a little notepad with me too. In the days of smartphones and tablets though I find myself using my phone now more than ever to jot down story ideas or concepts and even to craft full projects. I still absolutely adore the feeling of pen/pencil to paper, but it does feel good being able to share something with you so easily.
Thanks for reading, may these find you well and may your heart beat strong. Be kind to one another, love deeply and be weird.
Well, I went and did it.
Here’s the thing friends. I love expression, and I love it so much I want to express myself on all platforms. I think that writing is something special and magical. Writing can convey such meaningful and deep thoughts yet still leave things open for interpretation. I love that. This other medium is different. Its something interesting for its own reasons and I think I should explore it too. So, I will. I won’t be gone though, I’ll still be here every step of the way.
You wont get rid of me that easily.
Check the video out here.
No bad writing.
No. Bad. Writing.
A simple rule I placed on myself years ago. A rule that I did everything in my power to adhere to at all times. It was something that I used to judge myself with harshly. In a no holds barred sort of way where it started to seem as if I only wrote badly. If I wrote at all. The thing about this rule is that it only really exists through a specific perspective. Outside of that perspective its validity is in question. I may write something I like, you may not like it. I may write something I don’t like, you may like it. Thus the actual point of my rule is lost in its own illegitimacy.
Not to say that there is no such thing as bad writing. Because there obviously is, but I just mean to say that to criticize your own work extensively based on a vague rule is nonsense. The amount of ideas and concepts I scrapped based on this ideal is numerous. Yet maybe I did save myself from bad writing. Maybe I prevented myself from really screwing myself over with terrible writing. In that instance I thank my past self. In the off chance that I didn’t save myself from anything, then I guess it doesn’t matter anyways.
Point is. There is bad writing.
This is probably some of it.
I think that the difference, for me at least, in being a genuine writer or a hobbyist. Is committing full time to a project. It’s loving what you’re doing with all your heart, or just enjoying it. Not to say you can’t love what you enjoy, I think where there’s love there’s enjoyment, but to say that I’ve not always loved what I’ve enjoyed writing.
The other factor for me, which applies only to me, is that I’ve written many short stories but never anything greater. The biggest accomplishment I’ve had in my artistic journey had been writing several short stories that were linked by one character. It wasn’t anything that original or genuinely inspired. I ended up throwing it out.
The best example I can give is that this past February I started writing a book. I had a grand plan and a well thought out concept. I dove right in and committed too it fully. I enjoyed wiring it and had a lot fun, but days started passing where I didn’t write a word. Then weeks, and then a couple months, and I didn’t even think about it.
Then a Saturday afternoon (August 6th) I started typing up what I thought would be a short story. Three weeks later (last night) I finished writing my first full length novel. I loved writing it, the words just flowed and the ideas developed and I’ve never had more fun. I’ve barely slept the past three weeks and I’ve never been more exhausted but it’s felt entirely worth it. I still have many hours worth of editing ahead but I can’t wait.
I think the point that I’m trying to make, is if you have an idea you love then you should let it consume you. With this art we’re all trying to create, we have to give all of ourselves to it, in order for it to truly bloom.
Anyone who has ever created anything knows how it feels when you’re at the cusp of completion. When the vision in your head is almost realized in front of your face. When the work you’ve put in is staring back at you. Every artist of every variety knows that feeling. It’s terrifying.
Will I fuck up? What if it doesn’t work out? What if I did something uninspired? What if nobody gets it? What if my mom hates it? -the questions everyone starts asking at the wrong time. It’s an impossible task to accomplish but it’s at this delicate time that you need to turn off that part of your brain.
I envy those who can not give a fuck about anything and just do what they want without considering the opinion of others. I’m so stricken with ‘what ifs’ that I could write a book solely on those. Id call it ‘This probably won’t sell’. Nevertheless, I’ve reached the endgame, and I can actually taste victory. So it’s time to jump off the edge I guess and hope I land.
It’s what everyone says but nobody does. I’m trying to follow this more closely myself. Take a leap of faith. Take a risk. Believe in yourself. It is the only way.
What happens when the thing you’re focussing on changes to something else? Do you stick with the original plan and pursue that goal? Or do you switch gears with the changed perspective and see where that takes you? Sometimes you’ll be pulled in two seperate directions and other times something sweeps you off your feet. This has happened to me and I’ve done a lot of pondering. I think I have my answer.
I’ve been working on something since February that I’ve been really excited for you all to see. Something has occurred. A week ago I found myself pulled in a different direction with a new inspiration. It was like opening a floodgate and now I sit here with more writing done on this new story in the last week, than all the writing I did for my original project in the last six months. I’ve pulled very very late nights, very long days, and endless rambling to my loved ones. I think I’m in love with this story.
With that being said I was also in love with my original idea. However, I think a part of me always knew that it would have to evolve and become something different than I had otherwise intended. So, with that, it has. I now feel comfortable with my planned timeline and I think it’s ready to be shared. I still have much work to do on both projects, however I can tell you how this will work. My original story, Suffocate, will be split into two parts. The first will be put out this winter, and the second sometime next year. As well, The Gathering, what I am currently working on should be ready this winter as well.
Suffocate is coming.
One of the absolute best feelings in the world is when you get inspiration from a new idea and the flood gates open, drenching you with possibilities. That happened to me the other day. I don’t know how many of you have started watching the Netflix original Stranger Things yet, but it is incredible. I had been toying with another story for a while and I watched this series and it hit me all at once. The basic principle of the show involves a group of young kids who become a part of something dangerous. My story is vastly different, with different characters and even set in a different time, but that basic principle was all I needed to get started.
This story is something I am deeply in love with for another reason, it kicks off a plan I’ve been working on for quite some time as well. My own saga of stories. This is something I have wanted to do since I was a kid, and now I finally have a piece of the foundation. I am very excited about this project and want to share it with you. Below I am going to post a snippet of the story so far, I hope you like it.
I don’t want to give away the story of this or what I want my saga to be. However I will tell you this, I’ve wanted to do something fantastical and horrifying for quite some time. The book I’m currently writing is unrelated, but my plate is getting quite full as it stands.
Let me know what you think so far, this is only an excerpt of dialogue so far, but all of chapter 1 is finished and I am currently on chapter 2. As you can see the story is the same as the title of this post. The Gathering, It will be followed by a story that I have already written, I will wait to post that one until I have this one wrapped and in the can. The title of the next phase however, I will reveal. It is called The Fall. I look forward to sharing this universe of mine with you, I have worked very hard on it, and plan to keep bleeding more into it. Thank you for your time and your eyes.