Group/Activity_README

Being a part of a group is a magical experience. No matter what kind of group you’re in it’s an experience and it contains magic if you’re willing to look. And by that I definitely mean being the creepy guy at the end of the table who watches everyone else interact. It’s wholesome and fantastic! Always. It never fails. Unless you get engrossed in an interesting and captivating conversation, then you’re screwed. Or maybe then you’re actually participating. But isn’t that overrrated. I mean really, you could be watching the events unfold instead of actually being involved. Wait… that could be the anxiety talking. 

Hold on. My point makes sense. What I’m saying is that a group dynamic is intriguing. You have a varying collection of thoughts and personalities all colliding in a giant melting pot where we all contribute different aspects of our culture towards a larger gain. Right? Isn’t that what America was built on? Or maybe that’s too trumped up of a statement. My point still stands. When you have the opportunity to be present at a group event, you should do it. Worst case scenario you make a new friend or learn something new. 

As my dad always said “pour me another beer” but seriously, as my dad always said “pour me another beer”. So in the wise words of my father whom I love. 

Pour me another beer, kid. 

Also, I need to get back to my group event now. I’ve been very absent through writing his. 

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Seasons Greetings

Just uploaded a new video to my youtube channel. You can check it out on my site, just click on The Second Bedroom, or check it out down below in this post!

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Thanks for hanging out and have an amazing holiday season!

Strange and Untrue

Do you ever put on a sad song just to feel the melancholy vibe through you? Replay an episode of your favourite television show that you know will make you cry? Reminisce about long lost friends or loved ones? I think we all do this. In one varying way or another. In an effort to feel something we maybe think is farther away than it actually is. For instance, if life is great and purely happy, then sometimes we just want to feel sad. I think its a natural way for someone to remind themselves that they are human.

I think what I’m really trying to get at though, is that I thought there was something wrong with me for a long time. I used to think it was an error in my code that made me want to feel sad, and to be fair for a long time it wasn’t in a healthy way. Now as an adult however; its a good thing to let your emotions run free. Within reason obviously.

Now that I’ve gotten that out of the way. I want to get to the real core of the issue here. At what point does this melancholy reflection become a problem? I guess I mean that in personal experience I have let it negatively affect my life before and impact loved ones. It hasn’t been that way for a long time thankfully, but I suppose I just wonder if anyone else thinks about this at all.

You could call this a late night ramble. I just found myself in that magical loop today and asked myself a question.

“Who else does this?”

I figured a lot could relate. So I brought this to you.

Now I have one last thing to say. Despite my ramblings, I do have an answer to my question.

We all do this. To feel happy, to feel sad, to feel anger. To grow, and to see how far we’ve grown. To remember the ones that got us here, to mourn the ones who slipped away. It gives us the chance to be one with who we are now, and who we were then, and even who we will be. I regret a lot, I feel a lot and I miss a lot. I love a lot, I hate a lot and I’m indifferent to a lot. I’ll never be perfect, and that’s perfectly alright with me. I made my mistakes, and I’ll make more. I have friends and loved ones who accept me, and I accept them. I’m happy, and sometimes I like to feel the sadness. Because without it, I don’t think I’d know what the other thing felt like.

“All this feels strange and untrue, and I wont waste a minute without you”

Making Friends…

As I write this, I’m sitting in the back of a cab on my way home after a few pre-Birthday beverages with my best friend. It wasn’t super planned or anything, it was a fairly spontaneous event. Decided on in the last hour of our work shift while preparing to leave for the day. The cab driver is playin baroque music and I’m feeling a pretty good vibe right now. 

My birthday isn’t until Sunday, yet we met up for a bit tonight because my originally planned Saturday night birthday fun had to be postponed. Due to life circumstances, such as my best friends sister having a baby. Damn, birthday theft is hard, especially when it’s done by a newborn. You just can’t get mad at them! 

That wasn’t the only struggle of the week though. It has been a harder one, and I admit I felt pretty low, very disappointed at times this week. However now, as I stand in my doorway with my batman balloon and new lantern and shirt; I can’t help but feel blessed. This is the first year in a long time where I’ve had personal friends who care about my birthday. I’m talking the ones outside of your family and not your partner. I work with both of my friends, and somehow we manage not to piss each other off. 

It’s a rarity that you have a best friend that you can work with, but somehow I’ve been blessed with that. It’s been over two years now, and a new person has entered the workplace. For the first time in the two years we’ve worked there, she fits in, and we’ve sort of adopted her. It’s less two friends and a third wheel now and more three musketeers. How far we’ve come! 

For a long time I didn’t feel worthy of friendship, or as though I couldn’t handle it. I still feel that way sometimes, or find myself thinking that I shouldn’t bother to put in the effort. It’s nights like this, and days like today, where everything goes right and you can’t help but smile; that I feel as though I might finally be doing that thing I always thought I missed out on. 

*See title* 

Having Pride

Occasionally I will deviate from posts about writing to say something that I believe in or even to express an opinion. These are not intended to start debates or to fan any specific flames. They are however intended to be just what I have already said, forms of expression. If you agree with the things I say, fantastic! If not, I’m sure you have your reasons, and I hope you lead a happy and stress free life.

With all of the absolute insanity going on in the world it’s nice to take moments to be proud of the positive things as well. For instance, this weekend was Pride weekend in my hometown and while I didn’t stay for the parade it was nice to see so many people engaging in the festivities. That is something that I am proud of, the fact that the country I live in and the town I’m from accept all people regardless of sexual orientation. 

Loving everyone around you isn’t demanded, but treating them as your equals should be expected. Here’s to a happy pride weekend and a beautiful summer!